Tearing Down My Kingdom

Throughout my Christian walk I had heard God’s people say words like “die to yourself” and “pick up your cross”, but what did they mean?  I could dissect God’s word and pull out verses; Luke 9:23 “Then he said to them all, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.” And Matthew 16:24, “Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.”, I knew it was a command, God’s will for me, that I should be like him…and that is what I desire, but how do I do it?

Well, I started where we all should start…prayer.  I asked God to pluck out my sins and to illuminate my path. I asked for heavenly wisdom and for him to help me shake off the chains of worldly wisdom and corrupted thoughts.  I asked my father to keep me from being selfish and to put in me the desire to read His word daily. 

This is when the trails of my obedience started. 

You know, I always thought of myself as a smart, strong and competent, true independent woman.  I being born in 1978 grew up in the ’80s and '90s. And while all the world’s a stage, I was playing my role as a puppet.  Indorsing and embodying all of the costumes the world sold me, completely oblivious to its slow decay of my mind and body.

Think about it, while we grow up seeds of all types of ideologies, philosophies and religions are planted in us. And God must start weeding and pruning us as he would a garden. Sometimes this hurts, hurts our will not His will. Some plants I LOVED! I Absolutely thought they were beautiful! And I would argue with God not to dig them out, But there is no rebuking God and with a gentle whisper and tender hand he removed the plants that I loved dear. I would sometimes not see the reason, and think Him wrong. However, God is full of Mercy…knowing I was blind, gave me a due drop of patience and after time I saw clearly…He did not just leave a hole in the ground, he planted a new seed…And when His plant grew I saw that my plant of “beauty” was no plant at all, but a weed.     

I had been building my decaying kingdom for 30 years, equipping it with motes, towers, dungeons and gardens that are full of weeds. 

Through complete surrender, I give my kingdom to the One True King, may he continue to tear it down and build His up.

A great reminder that the things of this world are temporary.

1 John 2:17 ‘The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.”